A Few Reasons Why Talking About Your Problems Helps

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This post is dedicated to people currently going through various struggles/difficulties and at times it feels like you are on a lonely journey and the whole world is against you.

I sincerely hope this article would provide some form of encouragement and inspiration because you are not alone.

The Daily Mail published an article ‘Can you talk yourself better? It serves as a guide on what to look for in a counsellor, psychiatrist or psychotherapist because it appears more people are seeking counselling services to help solve their emotional problems.

My aim is to focus on a few reasons why talking about one’s problem isn’t a sign of weakness.

I understand that are different schools of thought on this issue however I am going to trust my instincts backed up by a bit of research and conclude that talking about your problems actually helps you emotionally.

You might not want to talk about your problems for the following reasons:

  • The fear of being judged or criticized.
  • The fear of being betrayed or gossiped about
  • People may not be willing to listen.
  • You cant express yourself clearly.
  • There’s an element of pride in you.
  • You are currently living in self denial

Once again this post will briefly touch on a few reasons why it’s good to talk about how you are feeling.

In no particular order they are as follows:

  • Talking about your feelings helps you stay in good mental health and deal with times when you feel troubled.
  • It helps you take charge as well as gain control of your emotions.
  • There can be more light shed on the current difficulties that you are going through.
  • Talking about your problems could open a door to opportunities and solutions.
  • You no longer feel so alone and unwanted.
  • You are able to receive encouragement and support from well meaning individuals and those who truly love you.
  • It may seem awkward but there’s always a sense of relief when you talk about your problems to caring individuals.
  • Talking about your problem strengthens you physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
  • Holding back your feelings might cause you to suffer anxiety, depression, headaches, high blood pressure……(Dr Edmund Bourne The Anxiety And Phobia Workbook)
  • Talking about your problems helps you deal with the feelings of being overwhelmed.
  • Talking about your problems helps you deal with mood swings.
  • The purpose of talking about a problem is to “let it all out”
  • Talking about your problems releases built up tension.
  • It gives you the opportunity to look at the problem in a different way or perspective
  • Talking about your problems exposes you to people who might have dealt with such in their past.

A few things to consider if you intend to gain the best from talking about how you feel.

You must:

Describe exact what the problem is and possibly write it down.

Take full responsibility for how you feel and avoid the blame game.

Discuss your problems with caring individuals (friends, family, professionals…)

Avoid forcing an unwilling person to listen you.

****One more thing: you can talk about your problems on this blog and I will be here to respond to each query(within my ability, training and scope).

I look forward to your comments and suggestions.



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by Ayo Olaniyan in Life Skills Development, Personal Development, Purpose

8 Responses to A Few Reasons Why Talking About Your Problems Helps

  1. Barbara

    One thing about talking things out is similar to writing things out. so often our thoughts are running in circles in our mind. They are often backed by strong emotions. When you try and talk about what is bothering you, it requires that you put your painful thoughts in some sense of order. It is hearing and ‘seeing’ those same tangled up thoughts as they begin to straighten out in a complete sentence or group of sentences. When this happens, the thoughts sometimes begin to be more understandable by you!

     
    • Ayo Olaniyan

      hello barbara
      how are you.
      i totally agree with the concept of it being similar to writing things out.the goal is to express oneself in order to gain clarity on the issue rather than be troubled in silence.
      take care and enjoy the rest of the day.

       
  2. emmanuel

    hey ayo
    where have you been bro? you’ve discussed something important and whenever i am troubled talking to my partner takes the load off.
    what a great post man!

     
    • Ayo Olaniyan

      hello emmanuel
      how are you?
      i have been extremely busy with a non profit organization but i’m still here lol!!!
      it’s great to know talking to your partner eases your burden.
      take care and enjoy the rest of the day

       
  3. Noch Noch | be me. be natural.

    a lot of it for me was fear of judgment. i’ve learnt to throw that away :)
    noch noch

     
    • Barbara

      Yes, always wanting to be sure I did what was right according to others. I, too, have learned to let go of that… most of the time. :-)

       
    • Ayo Olaniyan

      hello noch noch
      how are you?
      it’s good to know you’ve dealt with the fear of being judged by others.
      it could be frustrating at times but we must press on.
      take care then!

       
  4. Galen Pearl

    Brene Brown has written and spoken about the effect of shame in our lives. Many people don’t talk about things because they feel ashamed, they think they are alone in their experience. One thing we can tell ourselves is that no matter what we are feeling, there are many people in the world right this moment feeling the same way. We are never alone. Great post about an important topic.

     

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