My Thoughts Are Rubbish

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Pause for a minute …….

Look at the picture carefully.

The Free Dictionary Online defines rubbish as something negative, worthless or useless. It is of no benefit at all.

This brings me to the question for the day; Are your thoughts really rubbish?

The concept of this post focuses on the effects of negative thoughts/thinking and suggests useful ways of dealing with it.

The BBC website published a report ‘Negative Thoughts ‘Make You ill’. This was based on a research carried out by Dr Richard Davidson who discovered that people with a high level of brain activity with regards to negative thoughts responded worse to a flu vaccine and as a result concluded that people having negative thoughts could be prone to more illness than those with positive thoughts.

What Is Negative Thinking:

These are thoughts held which are negative views towards self, the world and the future. It portrays the notion that there is no way or hope of things ever changing positively or constructively. Instead of seeing problems as normal and tolerable or difficulties being resolved, people with habits of negative thinking, often overreact and blow things out of proportion.

My definition in context is:

Negative Thoughts constitute an ongoing rubbish constantly dumped in your mind creating  wrong perceptions, ideas, difficulties……..

Paying so much attention to these thoughts creates the opportunity for them to grow stronger enforcing a serious stigma on your outlook.

These thoughts are centered on:

You

• No one likes you, You feel lonely, worthless and not loved
• You are a failure(One of frank spencers classics)
• You can’t seem to keep a stable relationship because you always feel threatened.
• You are always rejected.
• You don‘t have any talent.
• You’ve got no patience whatsoever.
• You have no discpline or will power….
• You’re not too sure success is meant for you considering your………….

Your current experiences:

• You will never be able to please your boss.
• You’ve never been the kind of person who could….
• You just don‘t have the power to change
• You won’t even try changing.
• It‘s too late to move on
• You dont fit into several discussions.
• You are not educated to the level of…..

The Future:

• Your future is hopeless
• You can never cope.
• Life is misery and then you die.
• Life is unfair.
• People don’t care anymore.
• They’re out for whatever they can get.
• You have nothing to look forward to. 
• Things will never get better

There are more examples but this post will be limited to the ones above. Please feel free to suggest more.

John Maxwell states: Once your minds are ‘tattooed’ with negative thinking, your chances for long-term success diminish.

Once again, the aim of this post is to analyse your rubbish thoughts and suggest a few ways of dealing with them in order to achieve a positive outlook in life.

In no particular order, here are 35 ways to deal with your negative thoughts:

• It’s important you become aware of your negative thoughts, recognise them, identify the symptoms associated with it such as being moody, aggressive,…….
• Understand the unpleasant effects of keeping negative thoughts circling round your mind such as depression, loneliness, anger, low self esteem……..
• Make a conscious decision to start dealing with those thoughts either by resolving some of them, approaching various issues, asking questions or simply disregarding them.
• Try challenging some of your negative thoughts and beliefs in order to take a balanced position on issues.
• Start living in the present, not dwelling too much on the negative past experiences you’ve had or allowing it place a stronghold on you. It’s a difficult thing to do and although your past experiences have a way of conditioning who you are right now, it’s essential you are in control of your thought life.
• Be comfortable with who you are, your race, gender, height, weight, stature………..
• It’s important you are realistic about your goals, objectives and expectations.
• Remember to be moderately optimistic in your views/approach to life.
• Get proactive and stop seeing yourself as a VICTIM of circumstance.
• Learn to face your fears in a no holds barred situation.
• Be comfortable with failing, knowing it’s not the end of the road, but rather an opportunity to prove yourself and become successful.
• Smile and laugh a lot. Always remember the benefits of laughter.
• Practice a bit of positive affirmation. Talk to yourself, gain control of your thoughts, get some structure and order in your thoughts and for heaven’s sake get a grip!!!!
• Learn to try out new things. Take a deep dive in the world of the unknown mixed with possibilities and take risks making use of sound judgement and common sense.
• Have an effective alternative view or perspective to the things of life.
• Get involved in a hobby.
• Use your initiatives and start doing things for yourself with the hope you’d find joy and fulfilment doing so.
• This is slightly difficult, but don’t accept negative comments and criticisms when you know they aren’t deserved
• Don’t be too critical of yourself. Focus on your strengths and take time to work on your weakness and not drown in them.
• Keep working on all your destructive thinking patterns; leaving no stone unturned, with a view to resolving them.
• Always look at the good that could come out of events, people and experiences.
• Be grateful and thankful for the things you have in your life.
• Go on sing that song that’s ringing in your head. You know you want to lol!!! Take delight in singing.
• When doing tasks, break them into small or manageable units and take it one step at a time, starting with easier tasks then moving on to more difficult ones. This will build your self confidence and put you in the right frame of mind.
• Celebrate your success, achievements and milestones.
• Read inspirational books or listen to motivational speeches, talks, sermons or messages. This has a way of getting fed into your subconscious prompting a positive outlook to life and positive thinking.
• Get some food to eat. Go out for dinner, cook something delicious, get a Chinese take away or Indian curry. Eatttttt!!!!! but make sure you don’t overdo it………. Don’t be too greedy or stuff yourself because you are depressed. Just enjoy the smell of the spices, its taste, the way it was prepared, and the way it was presented………..
• Rest Well
• Take time to think about your goals.
• Write down your thoughts and review them as the day draws to a close.
• Take time out to meditate, pray…. This is a useful tool in overcoming negative thoughts.
• Interact with people who are supportive, fun to be with, challenging, positive, and constructive in their way of thinking…………………………….
• Show confidence when you walk. This boosts your frame of mind for the day.
• Listen, talk and communicate effectively.
• Seek professional counsel or services when necessary.

Once again are your thoughts full of rubbish?

I look forward to your comments and suggestions.

Ayo Olaniyan is a certified Unitive Life Coach, an Accredited Professional Counsellor with the Counselling Society and the editor of The Life Skills Magazine. For further information, please complete this form.

Tagged as: negative thinking, negative thoughts, rubbish, thoughts